Smart Ways Of Working


We are like this only So true , so very true .........

1. Everything you eat is savored in garlic, onion and tomatoes.

2. You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil.

3. You are Always standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the Airport.

4. You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think it's normal.

5. You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal Service missed to stamp.

6. You recycle Wedding Gifts , Birthday Gifts and Anniversary Gifts.

7. You name your children in rhythms (example, Sita & Gita, Ram & Shyam, Kamini & Shamini.)

8. All your children have pet names, which sound nowhere close to their real names.

9. You take Indian snacks anywhere it says "No Food Allowed"

10. You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone's house.

11. You load up the family car with as many people as possible.

12. You use plastic to cover anything new in your house whether it's the remote control, VCR, carpet or new couch.

13. Your parents tell you not to care what your friends think, but they won't let you do certain things because of what the other "Uncles and Aunties" will think.

14. You buy and display crockery, which is never used , as it is for special occasions, which never happen.

15. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.

16. You use grocery bags to hold garbage.

17. You keep leftover food in your fridge in as many numbers of bowls as possible.

18. Your kitchen shelf is full of jars, varieties of bowls and plastic utensils (got free with purchase of other stuff )

19. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (and travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes).

20. You own a rice cooker or a pressure cooker.

21. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.

22. You live with your parents and you are 40 years old. ( And they prefer it that way).

23. You don't use measuring cups when cooking.

24. You never learnt how to stand in a queue.

25. You can only travel if there are 5 persons at least to see you off or receive you whether you are traveling by bus, train or plane.

26. If she is NOT your daughter, you always take interest in knowing whose daughter has run with whose son and feel proud to spread it at the velocity of more than the speed of light.

27. You only make long distance calls after 11 p.m.

28. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight .

29. You call an older person you never met before Uncle or Aunty.

30. When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover you're talking to a distant cousin.

31. Your parents don't realize phone connections to foreign countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making foreign calls.

32. You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them from getting dirty.

33. It's embarrassing if your wedding has less than 600 people.

34. All your Tupperware is stained with food color.

35. You have drinking glasses made of steel.

36. You have mastered the art of bargaining in shopping.

37. You have really enjoyed reading this mail - forward it to as many Indians as possible

Definition of Tragedy

President Bush was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the discussion on the word "tragedy" so the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of "tragedy".

One little boy stood up and offered.."if my best friend, who lives on a farm is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy."

"No" said Bush, "that would be an accident".

A little girl raised her hand. " If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy."

'Im afraid not' explained the President "that's what we would call a great loss"

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Bush searched the room "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy"?

Finally at the back of the room a small boy raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said "If Air Force One, carrying you and Mrs. Bush was struck by a "friendly fire" missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."

"Fantastic"! exclaimed Bush. "That's right, and can you tell me why that would be a tragedy"?

"Well" says the boy - "it has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be an accident either".

Sambhar of 69 (lyrics)

Tears of a different kind from this version of Summer of ?69 [I strongly suggest that you sing with the real tune of the bryan adams number, HILARIOUS]

Sambhar of 69 (lyrics)
I had my first real six rupees,
stole it
from my father's pants.
went to a madrasi hotel,
to eat the sambhar of 69.
Me and some kadke dost,

had it all and we caught bukhaar,
jimy puked, joey got ulcers,
and Bagga ne maari dakar.

Oh when I went back there now,
the food was as stale as ever,
and though it was 1999,
still the sambhar was being served over there,

that was the worst food of my life.

Therez no use in complaining,
when you got no other place to eat,
rushed in the evening to the doctors clinic,
but he too was at the toilet seat, yeah

standing there waiting outside,
nurse told me I will wait forever,
oh and when I held my breath,
I knew that I had to use that loo
That was the worst food of my life.

Back to the sambhar of 69.

Man I was getting killed,
I was full and restless,
I needed to unwind,
I guess nothing can wait forever - FOREVER... NO!!!!

And now the dhabas are changing,
new dishes have come and gone,
sometimes when I pass that old madrasi lane,
I still smell it, I can't be wrong.

Standing in those unwashed clothes,
the waiters still call me in there,
oh the way my nostrils burn,
I know that it will be served forever,
what was the worst food of my life.

yeah it was the sambhar of 69,
the sambhar, the sambhar, the sambhar of 69 !!!

Settlement Issue

I never knew Hillary could sing so well. And well the lyrics almost reminded me of my teenage days. Sing along and I am sure that you will also start reminiscing about the fun days.

What Dreams Are Made Of - Hillary Duff
Hey now, hey now
Hey now, hey now

Have you ever seen such a beautiful night
I could almost kiss the stars for shining so bright
When I see you smiling, I go, "Oh, oh, oh!"
I would never want to miss this, cause in my heart
I know what this is

Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of
Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of
I've got somewhere I belong
I've got somebody to love
This is what dreams are made of

Have you ever wondered, what life is about
You could search the world and never figure it out
You don't have to sail the oceans
No, no, no
Happiness is no mystery
It's here and now, it's you and me

Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of
Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of
I've got somewhere I belong
I've got somebody to love
This is what dreams are made of

Open your eyes (this is what dreams are made of)
Shout to the sky (this is what dreams are made of)
When I see you smiling, I go, "Oh, oh, oh!"
Yesterday, my life was duller
Now everything is technicolor

Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of
Hey now, hey now, this is what dreams are made of
I've got somewhere I belong
I've got somebody to love
This is what dreams, dreams
This is what dreams are made of

Hey now, hey now
This is what dreams...
This is what dreams...
This is what dreams are made of

This is really amusing. A raccoon sneaks inside your house, steals the carpet and sneaks out. After watching this video I remembered a funny FRIENDS episode where Joey keeps mentioning Raccoon whenever he needs to give an excuse. That was truly hilarious.

Joey: Somebody opened the door to the coffee house and a raccoon came
running in, went straight for your muffin and I said "Hey don't eat
that-that's Phoebe's" and he said.. He said.. "Joey you stink at
lying." What am I going to do? :)

This is a real cute video of a birdie getting jiggy to the tunes Everybody.....yeah...Rock your body.... yeah.... Everybody yeah...Rock your body right......Backstreet's back alright! Checkout the cool moves :D

One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his.

Then he sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him.

He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. To his astonishment, the results showed a reading of zero. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the designated decoy."

Monkey Vs Dog

Hey all, this is a real funny video of a monkey eve teasing a dog :D

10. See me after class.

9. Didn't you ever buy the book?

8. It's a C -- but it's a strong C.

7. Fascinatingly convoluted.

6. My, what nice, big margins!

5. You must've been up all last night.

4. You should probably know the book ends differently than the movie.

3. Spelling requires more than just sounding it out.

2. Are you familiar with the term "plagiarism"?

1. Please tell your dad to try harder.

Marriage Counselling

A husband and wife came for counseling after 15 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 15 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately as her husband watched with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"

The husband thought for a moment and replied, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish."

The Magician's New Trick

A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week so he did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem with that strategy: the captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick.

Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show, "Look, it's not the same hat!" or "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table!" or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?" The magician was furious but couldn't do anything -- it was, after all, the Captain's parrot.

Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank, drowning all who were on board -- except the magician, who found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea. As fate would have it, the parrot also survived and, when the sun came up, he spotted the one safe harbor on the open ocean -- the same piece of wood. He landed and shared the space with the magician. They stared at each other with hatred, but neither one uttered a word.

This went on for a day, and then two days, and then three days. Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back any longer. "OK, I give up," the parrot said to the magician. "Great new trick. Now: where the hell is the ship?"